Let’s start today with the FA Cup quarter-final draw which took place last night, and our opponents will be Southampton away from home. When you consider the other Premier League opposition we could have faced, it’s another relatively kind one.
And, while I always say you can never take anything for granted, if you’re inclined to believe that the stars might be aligning for Arsenal this season, the fact Man City have got Liverpool could be another little sign in that regard.
The game takes place on the weekend of the 4th/5th April, with time and date yet to be decided. That’s the first game back after the Interlull, and if we progress in the Champions League, it would be followed by a quarter-final first leg against either Sporting or Bodo/Glimt. It’s also worth noting that should we beat Southampton, the semi-finals are scheduled to take place on April 25th, which is the day of our home game against Newcastle, which would have to be rescheduled. I know there are people out there who will be making plans, or have already made plans for that weekend, so heads-up there.
The full draw is as follows:
Southampton v Arsenal
Chelsea v Port Vale
Manchester City v Liverpool
West Ham v Leeds United
I don’t think this will actually happen, but my ideal scenario would see Port Vale beat a Chelsea side who are reduced to 9 men in the first half because they’re addicted to red cards (and also twats). West Ham will beat Man City in the other semi-final thanks to a goal from former Gunner Konstantinos Mavropanos who, in the process of scoring, injuries about 6 of their players. Pep stands disconsolate on the sideline, doing that weird spitting thing he does, before coming into his press conference wearing a Daft Punk helmet and talking only about how the privitisation of public services has been a disaster, and urging the general public to revolt against, and to target, billionaires like Sir Jimmy at Man Utd (despite the fact he gets his pay-cheque from quatriollionaires who own an entire country).
Then, finally, Arsenal (and by extension) me, will have revenge for 1980, when West Ham beat us in the FA Cup final. It will have been a long time coming, the scars might have faded on the surface but it doesn’t take much to scratch at those old wounds, and we’ll have Martin Keown, red and white scarf twirling around his head, on commentary saying, “Trevor Brooking. Alan Devonshire. Paul Allen. Danny Dyer. Ray Winstone. Some other bloke from EastEnders. 16.34% of all London black cab drivers. Your boys took a hell of a beating!”
I don’t think that’s too much to ask for. I was 9 in 1980, and while after winning the cup 1979 then losing the following year certainly gave me a grounding in on how football can lift you up then kick you in the bollix in equal measure, I’ve been stewing on this for a long, long time. I know, I should let it go. Too much time has passed, and there are worse things going on in the world, but please don’t underestimate my ability to harbour a grudge in the most extremely petty way possible.
There’s a tapas restaurant in Dublin that I walked into one day about 10 years ago to ask if they had a table. The lady was mildly rude to me when she said they were fully booked out, and I steadfastly refuse to go back. They certainly don’t care, nor should they give me a second thought. It’s a busy spot and it looks like they do well, but every time I walk past it I furrow my brow slightly and make a small wish that they get a bad batch of mussels or something. I am Señor Grudge when I want to be, so if the universe can correct a game of football that happened nearly 46 years ago, then I’m ready to accept that gift.
Right, I’m gonna leave it there for now. We might get some early team news ahead of the Champions League game tomorrow a bit later before the team travel to Germany, but we’ll bring you preview podcast on Patreon this afternoon with some focus on Bayer Leverkusen and what we can expect from them.